


the stars were pretty last night

by velvetpeach



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M, chanchen is so cute, sad but soft??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 22:25:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,090
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18061307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/velvetpeach/pseuds/velvetpeach
Summary: contrary to what everyone thinks he feels, the sky truly knows chanyeol's heart.





	the stars were pretty last night

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry for this mess, i can't believe i made this when i haven't even finished the forces yet (oops) but the new episode when chanchen had that awkward date really made me soft. also i am so so so incredibly proud of jongdae! him going solo is such a blessing and i'm glad he'll be able to express himself as an individual with his own style.
> 
> for now this fic will just end like this, but i might continue it after finishing the forces, or it might be part of a fic in the future if i get a grander idea for everything.

he never expected anything.

it was weird getting a text from jongdae saying he was concerned about chanyeol not hanging out with him and the rest of the guys lately.

it was even weirder crying over jongdae because of that, and chanyeol felt like an idiot, unable to just tell jongdae that he really did love him face to face.

in reality, chanyeol knew he was millions of distant galaxies away from jongdae, and hated himself for not being able to resist feeling anything for jongdae.

he cursed his name whenever he was reminded of the man who made his heart beat so thunderously— the man he couldn't have.

chanyeol had no other choice but to skip hanging out with the guys today, because he couldn't handle being around jongdae anymore, especially when he always saw him being so touchy and comfy with other people— the same way he acted around chanyeol.

two months ago, he kissed jongdae on the cheek and told him he loved him, and he didn't feel good about it at all, or didn't get any desired response.

"i'm sorry, yeol. i'm really, really sorry." jongdae passed it off as chanyeol being drunk before. and even if it wasn't true, it hurt. it hurt so chanyeol played along with it, because chanyeol meant all of what he said.

he meant it when he said he loved jongdae, and only thought of him in everything he did.

he could be practicing for a performance, but only think of how much better it could be if he was strumming along to dae's voice or harmonizing with him.

he could be buying some beer and instant noodles at 3 in the morning, and think how he could've had a blast with jongdae on the rooftop of his place's building, just goofing around.

but his so-called best friend made him feel like he wasn't even going to be a possible option for him, ever.

and each time they were together after jongdae told him made everything worse, because he never behaved differently, or never turned away.

chanyeol couldn't understand this, because was jongdae really just some jerk, or overly nice to realize he was in fact hurting chanyeol all the time. 

why did jongdae like to embrace him all the time, or even lace his tiny fingers into his? 

*

from: sehunnie

[8:04PM]

don't worry about it, jongdae didn't come over either.

* 

chanyeol glances at his phone, thankful for the update from sehun, but feels too drained to reply. he feels too tired to even think about why jongdae wasn't there.

why did chanyeol reciprocate the little actions from jd that meant so much to him, and just fool himself that jongdae meant anything more than friendship?

the night they went stargazing together was really something different for him though. he couldn't believe he didn't manage to combust from being alone with jd the whole night, but his equally newfound fascination in astrology and the cosmos melted his heart.

the stars were insanely breathtaking that night, and the different sounds of satisfaction jongdae giddily let out had made chanyeol's crush get even deeper that night, but he thought that looking at jongdae was even more rewarding— the way he pursed his lips when he was so focused, or was just so caring towards chanyeol and doing something as simple as zipping his jacket up for him because it was cold.

he was drinking hot cocoa tonight too— the same hot cocoa jongdae brought for them during that night. it was funny how they had a gig the following day, but just said screw it, and drank sugary madness just because chanyeol requested it from him.

the way jongdae seemed to focus on him so much, or responded to every single request of his so easily didn't help make his feelings falter at al. it's like the boy didn't know how to be cruel.

at least, intentionally.

but he was an idiot, chanyeol thought. too nervous to try anything and too afraid to get hurt.

maybe his feelings couldn't remained unchanged, and he would never fail to think of jongdae every time he gazed out the window to see the moon greeting the stars, twinkling almost as brightly as the thunder boy's eyes.

after all, the stars could never be as beautiful as he conceived they were in his mind— if they did not remind them of the most beautiful star he had laid his eyes upon.

the star he had so painfully loved, and would continue to love, until it was possible to learn how to stop loving him.

*

but beneath that all was hope.

it could go both ways. perhaps he could forget to love jongdae, or jongdae could learn to love him.

holding on to that, chanyeol hummed silently and tapped at his guitar, wiping the rest of his tears with the sleeve of his oversized sweater.

he hears a sudden buzz on his nightstand and runs to see what notification was to greet him this late at night. on a weekend, when everyone was supposedly having fun together, but he chose to stay alone.

with shaky hands and bleary eyesight, he feels like he's going to faint.

*  
from: jd

[10:02PM]

lol honestly i didn't get to follow the guys and idk if you're asleep or not, but i accidentally took a nap

from: chanyeol

[10:11PM]

Yeah I was actually asleep haha. Did you sleep well?

from: jd

[10:13PM] 

yup :3 the stars were pretty last night, didn't get to look at them tonight though, i'm still in bed

from: chanyeol

[10:14]

that's good to know. I'll be resting now, just text me if you need anything. Don't worry about me, I'm good.

*

jongdae doesn't text him after he sends that, and chanyeol gets ready for bed, snuggling in warm fluffy sheets amidst the cold breeze he didn't bother to adjust. his breathing finally settled and he gained composure, but the moment he closed his eyelids to sleep, he heard another buzz from his phone.

*

from: jd

[11:27PM]

can we talk? i've been lying to myself lately.

*

maybe the sky would always know what was in chanyeol's heart, and maybe the stars in the sky was an epiphany to jongdae tonight, because even though chanyeol would call jongdae his stars, he was so much more than that.

he was more ethereal than any celestial body. he was the sun, he was the moon, he was the universe.

jongdae— chanyeol's entire universe and love.


End file.
